Phil’s-osophy

#NaPoWriMo #8
My poem is about expectations, wants and meeting disappointment. I am a huge fan of Phil Dunphy from Modern Family. I was recalling one of his quotes,

“Key to a good birthday, lower your expectations”.

It need not be your birthday, but it’s apt for every day. Lower your expectations, and you can cherish each experience. I learned this fact the hard way many times. Still, I find it difficult to lower my expectations on people or situations. It’s like I am hard-wired with the “high expectation DNA”. Anyways I worship Phil Dunphy with all my heart and will try to follow him all my life.

Defeat

In a room, full of people

I longed for solitude.

In a world, full of animosity

I wished for serenity

In an era of misinformation

I yearned for enlightenment.

Little did I know, I would only meet disappointment.

~Deep

 

#NaPoWriMo #7

It’s the 7th day of the month.

I have this obsession with number 7, maybe from the time I started reading Harry Potter. (Yeah! Maybe earlier than this). Number 7 has nothing to with my poem today.

After writing the lines, I was clueless what to name this. And I didn’t try hard to name this poem.
As Shakespeare said in Romeo and Juliet,

“What’s in a name? that which we call a rose. By any other name would smell as sweet.

This poem talks about complications in life. This is more of a reflection, as I write it at the end of the day.

Things would have been less complicated,

 

If we had talked to each other rather than talk about each other.

 

Things would have been less complicated,

 

If we had written to each rather than writing about each other.

 

Things would have been less complicated,

 

If We had criticised ourselves than others.

 

Things would have been less complicated,

 

If we had lived in the moment than for years

 

~Deep

Deep on Hoarding

#NaPoWriMo #7
I have this peculiar habit of saving things for future. (Ask my friends, they know well).
“I am a keeper”!
Both the sentences are not related though. Let’s keep it that way. It’s okay not to understand all the things, let us enjoy these delusions.

Hoarder

Filled my pockets with fear, to ward off my pride.

Filled my pockets with anger, to hide my hostility.

Filled my pockets with sadness, to conceal my misery.

Filled my pockets with joy, in moments of glee and jolly.

Filled my pockets with trust, in this world of skepticism.

Filled my pockets with disgust, looking at the violence and hatred

Filled my pockets with anticipation, of a better place than this Universe.

~Deep

#NaPoWriMo #5

I was watching this TED video, The power of vulnerability  by Brené Brown, in which she says:

“Well you know that situation where you get an evaluation from your boss, and she tells you 37 things that you do really awesome, and then one thing… you know? An opportunity for growth. And all you can think about is that opportunity for growth? Well, that’s how my work went as well. Because when you ask someone about love, they tell you about heartbreak; when you ask people about belonging, they tell you the most excruciating examples of being excluded; and when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection.”

The sentence about love and heartbreak caught my attention. I kept thinking about my heartbreaks (Oh boy, they were few lethal enough). Right now, going back those times, I am glad that I moved on and learned valuable lessons. (This is the resilient me talking), yes but some nights, memories do come back and haunt. Reminded of those times, I wrote this small piece.

Unrequited Love

I wished to bid you farewell with all my heart.

I wished you looked back.

I wished we never met.

I wished you never left.

I wished I had given you all my hours.

I wished you had given me a second chance.

I wished to go back to start

I wished you came along with me this time.

                                                                       ~Deep

 

#NaPoWriMo #4

I am a very talkative person but when it comes to expressing my feelings to a third person I prefer pen over the mouth. I am better at hiding my sadness and discomfort behind my lame jokes than dealing with it. This reminds me of Chandler who used to crack weird jokes in uncomfortable situations. This poem also reminded me of a song by Boyzone, “Words”. It’s one of my favorite songs and I got carried away by it and couldn’t finish the poem. Apologies to the whoever are reading this incomplete poem. The irony is that I couldn’t bring up new words to finish this poem on words.

“It’s only words
And words are all I have
To take your heart away”
~ Boyzone, Words

Half-Done and Never said

Words are sustenance for a mind.

Words are coffee for memories.

Words can make a heart bleed.

Words can bolster the meek.

Words to play the punitive past

Words to compose the pleasing future.

Words can slay a soul.

Words can heal the battered and the bruised.

Words are fireflies, glowing brightly out of the dark wood of imagination.

Words are bullets, ready to be fired.

Words can encourage the mighty.

Words can discourage the docile.

Words to start a war.

Words to bring peace.

~Deep

#NaPoWriMo #3

Day 3 of #NaMoPoWri
It’s April 3rd today and I would like to tell something about the number ‘3’.
Three is the number of time:
Past-Present-Future
Birth-Life-Death
Beginning-Middle-End.
This is a really short poem about accepting the end and moving on.
Sometimes you just must admit the fact that things will never go back to how they used to be, and that this ending is really a new beginning.

“For last year’s words belong to last year’s language
And next year’s words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.”
― T.S. Eliot

Endings and Beginnings
Don’t worry about me, I will be all right.
It’s just I haven’t been myself since a fortnight.
Resisting to accept the fact that we grew apart.
The end is near but I am hankering for a new start.
Bidding you farewell from the bottom of my heart.
~Deep

#NaPoWriMo #2

It’s Day 2 of the month and I am desperately trying to keep my writing streak on. So here goes my second poem for #NaPoWriMo.
This poem talks a little about heartbreak. There is no dearth of heartbreak and poems on heartbreak in this world, so this is my attempt to add another poem to millions already there.

“Heart was made to be broken” – Oscar Wilde

Aftermath Agony

You were gone,
Dead long before I could realize your presence.
Looked like, Universe frantically wanted to teach me that,
Time doesn’t wait for anyone to be ready.

You were gone,
Dead long before I could complete our song.
Looked like, Cupid desperately wanted to teach me that,
He is God of love and never fair.

Now that you are gone,
Amidst heartbreak, I embrace love.
When I write about you, every word aligns perfectly,
Contemptuously laughing at my imperfect life

Now that you are gone,
Amidst longing, I accept the truth.
When I think about you, all I hear is howls of melancholy,
Yelping at my abandoned and dilapidated heart.

~Deep

NaPoWriMo

April is National Poetry Writing Month, or #NaPoWriMo and this is what I’m going to try. For thirty days, I’m going to (try and) write a poem every day. And I will be posting a few here. I am no expert at writing poems but I like writing them.

“Poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for ” 
– John Keating, Dead Poet’s Society

Here goes my first poem for the month.

 I Her and Him

I met him in 2011.
Four years seemed like seconds with this duffer.
Fifth year I did try to help him recover.
Sixth year turned friends in H to strangers in B forever.

I met her too in 2011.
Four years seemed like both heaven and hell.
Fifth year did go reasonably well.
Sixth year she was occupied with work twenty-four seven.

Dec’10, 16: I met her last. Dec’24, 16: I met him last.
I was there in their darkest times.
There were never in mine.
Mine seemed too petty to care for at times.

Maybe he will busy be till July.
Looks like she is still too busy to even reply.
I don’t jump to conclusions soon.
Three months of long silence didn’t feel like a boon.

I always tried to forgive and forget.
I never wished to live a life of regret.
I always craved for a fresh start.
At least for a brand-new ending with all my heart.

 ~Deep

Never Been Graduated

 2nd March was “Dr. Seuss Day” and I was remembering the time I read the book “Oh, the Places You’ll Go! “. I did graduate from college and school but never had an official graduation ceremony as such. I longed to be “graduated officially” a lot last year. So, to cajole me I started watching graduation ceremonies and reading books of that kind. While searching, I stumbled upon two wonderful books on graduation, they are as follows.

1) “Oh, the Places You’ll Go! “ by Dr. Seuss
Though a children book author, he teaches great life lessons through his book. Some of the memorable quotes from the book are:

“And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)
 
“You’re off to Great Places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting, So get on your way!”

“Your mountain is waiting” is the motto of my tough days.

2) “Very Good Lives: The Fringe Benefits of Failure and the Importance of Imagination” by JK Rowling
This is a published version of J.K. Rowling’s commencement speech at Harvard University. Usually, people watch commencement speeches, but I am that odd idiot who reads speeches. In the speech, Rowling talks on how to embrace failure using stories from her own life. The book had some wonderful sketches here and there. Notable points:

“We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better.”

“Life is difficult and complicated, and beyond anyone’s total control, and the humility to know that will enable you to survive its vicissitudes.”

JK Rowling is one of my the favorite authors. And I felt good after reading the book and before writing this post I watched her video again to relive that moment I experienced last year. In a weird way, I graduated vicariously by reading these books. But next year I am looking forward to receiving my post-graduation degree in a Graduation Ceremony.

PS: This is a late post. These days college work is keeping me very busy.

Internet Sabbath

Last weekend my college hostel experienced two-life threatening problems.

• Slow Internet Connection
• Drinking Water supply problem

Problems have been mentioned in the order of priority. Whole of the Sunday, surprisingly I wasn’t online much. Till dinner I was in my room doing some reading, writing and more of napping. At the end of day, I realized that I achieved some milestones unknowingly.

• I did not watch a single YouTube video.
• Spent just few seconds on Facebook owing to bad internet connection.
• Every weekend I try out new apps but this Sunday I couldn’t even open android play-store.

Last Friday, I was trying to build a naive internet-based Phone and two days later I don’t even care about internet. So, this is a proof that I can live with and without internet. (Conditions apply). A question arises everyday are we really utilizing the internet or misusing it?

In the book “Wasting time on the internet”, Kenneth Goldsmith makes us believe that our time on the Internet is not really wasted but is quite productive and creative. This is one fascinating read wherein the author tries to explain that by “wasting time,” we’re creating a culture of collaboration. The author is famous for the “Printing out the internet” art work which was inspired from Aaron Schwartz. Last chapter of the book, “101 ways to waste time on the internet” was quite informative.

But who needs to be guided to waste time on the Internet?
To end on a lighter note
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And I took the road with free access to Internet.